For the nth time, my emerald green bag made its presence felt in my dreams last night.

With it on my back, I went to the school where I worked at four years ago. I met old faces and new teachers and my former Korean boss who gave me a very special welcome. The atmosphere was covered with anticipation and happiness and I got the chance to see and interact with my old colleagues. On my arrival, I was given a special task at once to collect unpaid tuition fees from the students. With a piece of pen and a notebook I headed for the company driver's house as someone had told me earlier students remitted their money to him.

With my dragged feet, I went to a familiar place where at the gate, relatives of the driver met me and my presence created a stir. Someone had told me that he keeps some students' money and I had to see him to gather the amount. The driver's house was an ordinary two-storey house without ceilings and windows. Everybody in the place told me he wasn't there. I couldn't believe them, I insisted I had to go inside the house and start looking for him. The amount of the money was huge that I really had to have it collected.

I stormed in and the driver, already a senior citizen as he seemed in my dream quickly got out of his bed on the upper floor of the house. I saw no stairs from the inconcrete ground floor extending to the man's room. I wondered how he could go down. Then, out of the braces of the ceiling, he pulled out what looked like as a rusty galvanized gutter, cascaded it down and he descended.

Tucking the money inside my bag, I hastily left the place. Then I was drifted into a place barricaded by tendrils of some tropical vines and vegetables that I had to make my way out of the compound. The house gate I saw earlier just vanished into thin air. Next sightings showed me some small huts and I was having a hard time finding exits.

The place was so defeaning other than the rustling water under. It seemed desolate despite the presence of some households. I was supposed to meet my boss after. When I looked down, I saw the barefoot me. I don't know where I put my shoes and I don't even recall taking them off, then I had to fold my slacks to knee-level while sluggishly proceeding downwards a muddy slope with the running water aggravating the slimy condition of the soil. I was struggling hard not to slip as I was making my way to the first hut down the slope.

A woman was eagerly standing by the window of the hut and pointing her hands to some rubbish drifted along the water. There were empty plastic bottles of mineral water and shampoo. Out of compulsion, my submissive mind started picking them up that I ceased to recall my original intention-to meet my boss. Suddenly, when I grabbed my backpack, it turned into an empty sack of rice and I remember putting the litters there.

My descent was so freaky that another woman at the base who surely recognized me was losing it and started saying at the top of her lungs, "Because you are a gambler and you shoud stop gambling...." Well..

My Bicycle In An Envelope

Done counting the only money we have left(one five-hundred peso bill, two twenty-peso bills, and two five-peso coins to be exact), my boyfriend and I were about to leave home for a dine outside when a knock at the door prompted me to pocket in the money and open the door. To my surprise, it was Joel, a highschool classmate of mine.

Of all the time and all the people there are who may be intrusive to ruin my plans, why Joel? Standing at the door, his skinny built and fair complexion well matched the frame of the door and the light radiating from the outside. I don't know but he just appeared in my dreams. I haven't seen this guy in the last ten years and from what I have heard, he is already married and is happily enjoying an agrestic life in the lowlands.

He was damn good looking that I remember leaving the place and my boyfriend at once. My boyfriend just vanished from the scene, thus I didn't picture his reaction. He was there to invite me to his home after showing him the money I got. He told me of a plan to have fun and pleasure with another guy friend waiting for us at his place. I told him I just got little money but he said it was enough and he insisted I should just follow him.

While we were walking on the road, obviously enjoying the company of each other, some friends of mine in the neigborhood saw my presence. All of a sudden, Joel through body language told me that he would rent a bike to reach his place and I should just follow soon. I had no choice but to talk to some of my friends whom I have not seen for several years. How they missed me a lot that I almost forgot I had to go after Joel since I didn't know the route to his place. When I searched for my money to hail for a jeepney, what came out of my pocket was an envelope and I remember taking a bicycle out of it.

Following him on the same road, I caught a glimpse of several half-naked construction workers digging a hole along. I stopped and in my hand, all of sudden appeared a shovel. I was trying to attract the guys' attention that I think I volunteered to lend a helping hand. After a few rounds of casting up some lumps of soil, my shovel got stuck. I looked down to see what happened and I saw a strange creature between the blade of my shovel and the soil under.

The Strange Creature

I got scared at what I saw next, and I had to push my shovel even harder to avoid its fleeing it's position. While doing so, I was calling in some of the construction workers to help me catch it. The creature had the tail of a mouse, the body of a stingray and the head of a snake. It started moving its way onto my shovel and started biting the iron. It's head was blazingly red and the neck connected to the stingray-like body seemed like a flexible metal. I just kept screaming.... I forgot to follow Joel and I forgot that I was just dreaming.
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Arriving at Norjane's place gave me a nostalgic picture of twelve years ago-those years when their house mirrorred poverty in that area of the neighborhood. Made of dilapidated galvanized iron, the ground floor of the two-storey house was left unfinished even before their father passed away.

Norjane is one of those cousins whom I have shared the bitterness of life. I find sweetness though in one of our experiences in our childhood. After exhausting ourselves playing under the scorching heat of the sun, she would often invite me to her home and since there was nothing else to eat, we would sneak in for some cold rice mixed with brown sugar. Her mom was always outside then as well as her dad. Sometimes, her not-so-younger sister would join us leaving the small jar of sugar and the sooty pot of rice empty. I would have preferred rice mixed with salt but the consolation of eating for free already gave me the satisfaction.

In my dreams, I saw the younger version of me collecting some debts from the people I know in the neighborhood. I just came from Norjane's place and her younger sister told me that Norjane had been gone for a long time to settle her own family in a far away place. I don't remember her borrowing any money from me but I don't know why I had to see her in my dreams last night.

With a pen and a notebook in my hands, my feet took me to a nearby sari-sari store (a variety store or a store smaller than a convenience store). From the entrance, I saw some people drinking beer with the store owner busily serving them at the veranda next to the store. I moved closer to the veranda and some familiar faces there created a stir. They all approached my presence.

At first when I saw them at the veranda, they were all Filipinos but as they started to gather around me some Korean faces also appeared. Two Korean females sporting some long hair who seemed like my previous students took each of my arms and led me to a stairs extending to the interior of the compound. One of them kissed my cheek and I screamed in disgust. Near the stairs, I laid down some receipts and list of debts and while doing some inventory, I came to a halt...

I felt like puking when I noticed a long strand of hair protruding out of my mouth. I started pulling it out but it seemed so long that I felt exhausted in doing so. I asked the help of one of the Korean females I met earlier, she helped me pull it out and while she was doing it, I freaked out as the hair turned into a copper wire. While she was enjoyably removing it out of my system, the copper wire was forming into a spider web and some tiny spiders came to life crawling onto the web. When I looked at her to tell her to stop, she turned into someone who looked like "Sadako"-the character in the movie, "The Ring."

A Pizza Park?

We were looking for a pizza restaurant. I saw myself and my boyfriend enjoyably taking a walk at an unfamiliar park. The park was U-shaped. Both edges of the park were small stairs which served as the entrance and the exit. Many unfamiliar faces congested the surroundings-both Filipinos and foreigners. At the curve was a short bridge with pristine running water under. The curve was somewhat elevated giving its look a beautiful stage. The park seemed like a very wonderful stage with its small stairs intermittently scattered around.

As we were enjoying ourselves around, I saw a lot of tables and hundreds of people eating pizza. There were also cubicles with classy tables inside for VIP customers. To my estimate the circumference or the length of the park was around 300 hundred to five hundred meters. It looked huge.

We managed to get our own table and ordered pizza. While eating, some loud noise started to fill the air. I saw Stevie Wonders, Madonna, The Pussycat Dolls giving their performances one after the other while going around the park. The mood was so festive that everybody was so happy enjoying their pizza. There were also a bunch of drummers in costumes adding to the jolly ambiance. More people were starting to flock the place and we decided to leave.

I saw myself with some take-home pizza in my hand having a hard time climbing a spot and I failed. My boyfriend was waiting for me at the top.

Two Wheels in My Hands

As I looked inside the coach, I saw four people seated waiting for me to fill the empty slot. I moved in and as I looked at the coach driver, he gave me a familiar physicality of a male neighbor in my hometown who also happens to be a ponyboy in real life.

The carriage swaggered down the road and it even moved faster as the driver whipped it with its leather strap. All of a sudden, the carriage got dismantled and I was left behind standing on the road. The carriage was still in motion though. When I looked down, I saw two wheels under my feet and I was pantily having a chase.

The distance got longer and while I continued my pursuit, I gave another glance at my feet. The carriage wheels under turned into two spokeless wheels like that of a sofa rollers. When I took another look, the wheels shifted to my hands and turned into carriage wheels again. Though the wheels had shifted to my hands, I felt like I was riding on a something and just kept moving forward.

I started to slow down and as I approached a nearby waiting shed, the two wheels in my hands turned into two pots of beautifully hanging phlox plants.

Things like, "What If just went home and never returned the whistle?" "This is a good piece of a present for my sister whom I haven't seen for a long time." But I think my conscience played a major role. I kept thinking outside the restaurant about what to do with the whistle. It was just beside the main entrance of the church. I decided to just give it to the male sextons I met at the church's backdoor.

The church's front door was still open at that time and to my amazement the lights were still on. I got inside and I saw there were already a lot of people praying inside. The priest was giving a sermon and I saw lots of umbrellas sprawled on the side aisle to the right. I think I saw my umbrella and I quickly grabbed it. A woman in yellow shirt rose up from the pew and started telling me it was her umbrella. Feeling restless that the scene might create a stir, I just put up the umbrella and lay it on the aisle. I remember ruining one of its hinged ribs and the woman in yellow started yelling at me. I quickly ran towards the backdoor not minding the people there. I saw a priest whose face I can't picture waiting for me at the backdoor. The doors were again open. He handed me my umbrella and gladly gave me a twenty-peso bill and told me to leave.

The incident made me feel more guilty and I lost my guts to confess about the whistle. The whistle was still in my pocket. The male sextons again closed the door and as I looked at the restaurant's reception area, its door was already shut. The place was dark. The priest and the sextons have gone and I was alone. I felt I was trapped and there was no way out. The place at the back seemed like a barricaded compound.

I moved to the right past the restaurant groping for my steps. It has begun raining again. I found a pathway extending further, I followed it and beside me on my right were bushes of what seemed hibiscus or bushy tea plants. On my left was a mass of soil slanted upward. I tried to mount the slope and I saw a small opening through the barb wires obstructing the exterior of the place. I was starting to feel exhausted. Felt like my umbrella and the whistle inside my pants were burdens. When I moved closer, I saw a road going down to my right and I saw students passing by. Just a few feet on my left, I saw a military post and I saw around three sentinels in fatigue attires. Each of them holding a rifle.

I tried to remain still in my position. I was bent under a small bench put up at the side of the road and near the military's post. Still with my umbrella in my right hand, I could clearly see the soldiers as it was dawning. One of the soldiers was on the look out at the post and the other two were seated on the ground facing the bench where I was under. They were pointing to my direction and I doubted they could see me because it was dark in my spot. A few seconds later, the surrounding has gone brighter and I was caught. I dropped my umbrella as it has turned into a rifle. Got scared of being charged with illegal possession of firearms. The two soldiers grabbed me by the left shoulder and I started crying. I told them I had to go to church on foot under the lashing storm just to pray and they shouldn't catch me. Later, the two sextons arrived and they tried to argue with the soldiers for my release.

When I got up, my right shoulder was so achy. I think I might have leaned too much to my right for a long time while I was asleep.

Returning for my umbrella

It was late in the evening, around 9:00 to my estimate. I was wearing a gray shirt and a pair of khaki pants. After asking permission from my boyfriend and with an umbrella in my hand, I saw my self braving a lashing storm. The umbrella wasn't enough to protect my self so I was very drenched in the rain as I remember crossing the street. It was really dark and there was no one around nor did I see any light to signify presence of nearby structures.

Moving further, the train track above me caught my glance. I went on walking 'til I found myself on the way to a church. For no reason, I was so eager to go to church despite the inclement weather.

The church was so inviting at my arrival. The front door was open and its radiance gave me the impression that hundreds of chandeliers might have been installed adorning the ceiling of the church to provide glowing illumination. I inched myself towards the entrance and it was so quiet inside. No people around. The place was so quiet. I just walked my way and made my exit at the backdoor of the church. Then, I remember leaving my umbrella beside the concrete doorway. Since, there was no church service, I sneaked in at the restaurant next to the church.

The restaurant looked classy and its entrance was adjacent to the backdoor of the church so I decided to just drop by and find my way out there. I remember talking to a fat lady over the counter. I think she was a clerk. All of a sudden, as I was about to leave the whole place, I realized I had forgotten to take the umbrella which I left at the backdoor of the church. I ran back quickly but two male sextons just locked the doors. I didn't see my umbrella. By then the, rain has stopped.

I went back to the reception area of the restaurant. Again, I had to talk to that fat lady but I can't recall what we had to talk about. Behind her at the counter were collections of wines and on the enclosure at the the right side were trinkets of sort in shiny colors. I saw a silver bell hanging on the wall. It was made of silver. It looked like a pendant tied on a brown rope, maybe a little bit smaller than a chicken's egg. Just above it was an inscription saying that it belonged to the church and was just on display there. I just don't know why, but I remember I just had eight pesos left in my pocket and out of nowhere, I saw myself snatch the bell and quickly put it in my pocket. It was so fast that the clerk didn't notice. I quickly made my way out. Once outside the restaurant, I tried to take a look at the bell again but then it just turned into a silver whistle. At that time, I was so guilty. I stood there for sometime and I made a decision. READ THE POST RETURNING TO RETURN THE WHISTLE TO CONTINUE.

A Haven for Americans

Whenever I get really tired, I often furtively enjoy a siesta in my room early in the afternoon. Then my neighbors start looking for me so we could play 'tong-its'-a filipino card game. This is usually the case when I get home from work every weekend. I also dream a lot at this time of the day but sometimes, I get nightmares.

Just like yesterday, my dreams took me to a place which once was a haven for American soldiers near my hometown. The place was once a military base and also a prestigious tourist attraction in the Philippines. However, in the early 90's a resolution granting the Philippines custody over the place was approved and a lot has changed in the place since then. These days under the tutelary of the Philippine Government, the once-paradise place abundant with pine trees is now a picture of greedy modernization and development with its high-rise buildings and well-maintained golf courses but denuded landscapes.

Another sequence which I can recall is seeing my mechanic friends in my dream. One of them happened to be an elementary and highschool classmate of mine. We were at our elementary school though we were already grown ups. We were waiting for the flag ceremony to start. We were talking to each other about my life here in Manila and they were telling me stories about my hometown which I don't recall. I had a gray backpack. Beside me, I noticed a tall, lean guy who was so good-looking. He resembled a Korean actor I have a crush on. He was also wearing a backpack. It seemed that the sizes of our backpacks were the same.

When the bell rang, we hurried to the main ground to form our lines. I was a little preoccupied that I told the good-looking guy to carry my bag. I saw him put my bag in his bag. His bag seemed a giant one, like a mother bag and mine seemed like a baby bag. After the flag ceremony, I went home and when I arrived at the waiting shed where my mom was, I remembered I forgot to take back my bag from him.

Just before I got out of bed this morning. I was hanging on a huge track that seemed like a train as it was ascending into the skies. I was hanging on for dear life and the view from the top sent shivers to my spine. I got scared that I might have loosened my grip and fall down out of consciousness.

When I woke up, I thanked God, it was just a dream.

I have been used to going to sleep at around 3:00 or 4:00 a.m. So far getting at least six hours of sleep always keep me through the day. I have to spend at least ten hours a day working and I am glad I can survive the busy and tedious routine.

My dreams last night sent me once more to my hometown. There they were. My mom, my sister who happens to be our youngest among my five siblings, and our youngest brother. It was a rainy afternoon. We were on the side of the road. My mom was in one of the corner of the waiting sheds there selling some ornamental plants which appeared to me as chocolate in pots. She was with an aunt of mine who is also engaged in selling ornamental plants as a means of livelihood. My brother, my sister and I were supposed to be going on a trip out of town. I was at the waiting shed watching my mom and my siblings inched closer to the road hailing for a jeepney. I noticed that a lot of jeepneys passed by but none stopped to give us a ride. While waiting, I was listening to some music while texting. My cellphone apparently seemed like a discman, or perhaps a discman with the feature of a cellphone. It was very vivid as I saw red-wired earphones connected to my ears.

Beside my mom was my black luggage. My sister turned her head and told me that a jeepney was coming and that we were leaving. I said wait, held my luggage and I saw it filled with milk. There was no leakage, when I looked at it again, it turned into a black garbage bag, and I had to hold tight its opening to avoid spillage of the milk. I then remember asking for a plastic cup from my mom. I told my sister wait, as I had insisted I would have to drink three cups of the milk before leaving. The jeepney just passed by and we had to wait for another one. I held to garbage bag with me as I got out of the waiting shed and moved closer to the road. Fortunately, the milk inside was intact. We hailed another jeepney and when I was about to get on, the garbage bag turned into a white garbage bag. The milk still inside, I called my mom's attention to hand me the plastic cup. I insisted I had to drink three cups of milk before getting a ride. I remember the trip never pushed through and then I woke up.

Rubber Eyes

When I was a highschool student, I was a very active newswriter for my school's newspaper. Writing in Filipino or my own tounge was my forte and got the chance to win some awards and national exposure. When I got into College, I joined another school organ but then it was more difficult. I was obliged to write in English and I really found it hard. Until now, writing my posts somehow gives me stress. As much as possible, I want to try to make it better but I always see the picture of myself having a hard time groping for the right words.

My dreams last night reunited me with my close highschool and college friends whom were mostly writers at that time. At first the scene was at the office in my university where I saw fellow writers for the University Newspaper. They were doing a review of my article and giving me commendations. I remember my female editor-in-chief giving a thumbs-up. While she was looking at my article, I looked down and I saw my blogsites instead. I went out of the office so happy and then I met my highschool friends outside waiting for me. (I haven't seen them for almost ten years now.)They saw me holding a white copy of the newspaper and they all scuffled to take a hold of it. Jordan, one of my friends, gave me a friendly hug and an approbation. (He also happened to be my crush in highschool but I did not have the guts to tell him and anybody else about it. I was a closet then.)Everybody was frantic and happy that one group of my friends were having a party. Then I saw that we were inside the gym, they were on the bleachers, more than five of them faring sumptuously on chicken with noodles in big black bowls. They were eating a lot and had an eating contest not minding the mess they created on the bleachers. I just ignored them as I was with the other group of friends with Jordan and they just invited me to lay down. There were also around five of us. Jason, the wackiest in the group, was so excited telling everyone that we should sleep all together because we had not seen each other for a long time. It was like an overnight gathering.

When we were all laid down, Jayson started giving each of us a pair of rubber eyes. He said that those would give us a sound sleep if we put them on top of our eyes as we close them. Jason was wearing a black trench coat then. I held the set of rubber eyes he gave me and they were really soft and mushy. I decided to stand up and complain to him but then the scene shifted to my aunts front yard. Jason suddenly disappeared. Jordan was inviting me to leave as he was not familiar with the place. My other friends also disappeared in the scene. As I and Jordan were to exit the gate made up of sterling wires, our English high School teacher in our Junior year greeted us. We were surprised at the sight of her. We had a small talk but I don't remember what we talked about. Further as we went on, we met another English teacher. She was our fourth year English teacher....

As I got up today, the last thing I remembered was that I was eating some tiles and I could feel them gritting in my teeth. I didn't sense any taste of them.

The Bouncing Donut

I had another dream last night. I remember I was with some old friends and we decided to see a movie. Strange because the location of the movie house was on a mountain. I think we were wanting to see an English Film.

The movie house was really big. It appeared like a dome outside. When I got inside, it appeared as a tunnel to me. We were at the balcony and the orchestra was plain concrete tiled stairs extending to the ground. Looking at it from the top, the balcony must have been situated really high off the ground almost touching the roof of the cinema. Looking furthere to my left, I saw another set of bigger stairs connected to the ticket-teller's window. The window was beside the balcony where we were. The set of stairs were hanging and below it was a road where cars were passing by. Following the cars with my eyes going northbound was the end of the tunnel and the light coming from the outside was enough to provide dim illumination to the cinema. When I set my eyes back to the stairs, I saw a small donut bouncing from the ticket-teller's window. The donut was bouncing like a ball 'til it fell off the hanging stairs and disappeared.

I saw myself watching either an American or English movie on one of the posts inside the balcony. The TV set was a twenty-one inch plasma TV plastered on the post. Unknowingly, I found myself watching the movie with one of its characters. The man looked like one of the actors in "Anaconda"-(the actor who played the chronicler's role and the one playing golf on their small boat)He was tall, had curly hair and was wearing a gray suit. When I was watching the movie, I saw myself in it. The scene was on a hill beside a road. The hill was partly denuded and all I could see was some barb wires surrounding the road on top. There was a slope below and some bamboo's towards the base of it. Two Caucasian lovers were walking and they were in trouble when a car stopped by and some guys were forcibly pushing them to get in the car. I wanted to help them as my friends behind me were calling me to leave the scene. I stayed and when I turned my back to see my friends leave, I heard a shot. I saw the girl sloped down the hill dead and stuck at the bamboo trees on the base.

When I woke up, I immediately grabbed my pen and small notebook. While writing some notable scenes, my boyfriend asked me what I was doing. I just told him to go back to sleep.

An Old Neighbor's House

It's true. Coming up with a post at least four to five times a week needs commitment. I should have written this post earlier had my boss not given so many students to handle. I rarely have a breaktime these days and I am a little afraid that I may not be able to do my homework religiously.

One of the problems of narrating my dreams here is that, I sometimes have a hard time recalling the sequences of my dreams, the pictures are clear but most of the time, I don't remember which happened first and so on.

I want to start with the scene where I saw the old picture of my neighborhood. (I live in the mountains as what most people say when I tell them of my roots and my origin. People in a more urbanized city tend to generalize that people who come from the mountains live in the mountains literally. Where there is lack of civilization and awareness to modernization and technological advances. I think it just so happened that I live in a suburb which is not far from the city in my hometown.)

In my dreams, the whole neighborhood was a lush sanctuary. There were lots of pine trees, and towering ferns, and those grasses that look like big clovers(about two feet in height which look like mini umbrellas). At present the neighborhood, is congested with houses and people who migrated from other towns and rarely you find trees. I saw myself looking for my childhood friend's house. Our houses were separated by several hills and I had to pantingly reach his place a few hills from my house. When I got there, I was surprised to see an unfinished house or a newly constructed house with its hollowblocks visibly outside. The house had no painting but it looked great as a bungalow with it's two attics on the facade.

I was calling out my friend to see my arrival but there was no reply and somehow I felt creepy outside. I climbed a tree almost connected to one of the attics and I broke the window to get in. To my surprise my friend was waiting inside with his mother and they did not get angry with me. They warmly welcomed me with a hug.

Somewhere in my dreams, I know I saw my mom's and my sister's face. I just don't recall what their roles in my dreams were. Somehow that signifies how I have been missing them. I haven't gone home since February because of fear that my dad might got mad at me again. After all this time, I haven't had any savings and I remember myself promising my dad I would pitch in for the improvement of our lowly house the last time I visited home.

Just before I got out of bed this morning, I dreamt of a famous Pinoy Big Brother Housemate. He was with an actor whose face I can't picture. The setting was agrestic as I saw mango trees and a farm. The PBB (Pinoy Big Brother)housemate was riding a bicycle. He was going to and fro the farm free-handly riding the bicyle. Beside him was this Philippine Actor in walkaton to keep up with the pace. Both were wearing underwears while walking and riding the bicycle and they were bravely exposing their crotches to the people around. The PBB housemate crashed because he lost control and he landed into a nearby swamp.

Spooning Oliver in the Dungeon

As I woke up this morning, my mind was muddled with thoughts as to how to write my dreams last night. I remember three sequences and I am afraid they might get interwoven as I present them. I will narrate the more vivid ones.

The first sequence saw myself in a queue of passengers, I am not sure if we were waiting for a ride, but everytime the queue got longer, I saw each of us turn into plastic pellets or marbles and a cataract of water just washed us away. Majority of the pellets were in green and red colors. We had to form a file again but we got scattered with a surging mass of water from somewhere else just the same. The scene turned into a flood and I was already a human figure. Everybody else was running for their lives seeking higher grounds to escape the deluge. Then I saw myself on a hill overlooking a dungeon. It seemed like a tower and I could see its inside. Inside the dungeon one familiar face surprised me. It was my fellow-teacher Oliver having a sword fight with a guy whom I remember wearing a white shirt. Oliver was wearing a light brown shirt and they were engaged in a serious sword fight. I didn't picture myself gigantic but I held a spoon, put it inside the opening of the dungeon and I started intercepting the fight. I was like mixing a cup of coffee with tiny human beings inside.

The flood was gone and so was the fight. Oliver came out of the dungeon victorious and he held his beaten opponent in his right hand barbecued on his sword. There were a lot of people outside shouting and cheering and I noticed one woman crying. She was looking for her son. The woman's face was familiar with me. (I think I saw her once loafing around the Casino.)Then Oliver flung the corpse off his sword on to the sterling wires which surrounded the dungeon outside. The corpse got stuck on the sterling wires and little by little, it melted away. Its white shirt was what remained on the sterling wire. I didn't see any blood stains on the shirt. The woman I saw earlier approached the sterling wires, took down the shirt and she started crying. "He was my sonnnnn!" She was crying out loud while looking at each of the people around. I gave her a comforting hug.

Too Bad, I didn't write

Normally, before I go to sleep, I have beside me a small orange notebook where I write down ideas just before going to sleep. Apparently, that notebook is where I also keep important account names and passwords. I went to bed at around three in the morning and as I lay down, I realized that I had put the notebook on the desk situated at the foot of my bed. Just before dozing off, I told myself that I would just save some dream sequences on my cellphone since my cellphone is always next to me.

I bet I had a nice dream. I felt conscious at around seven in the morning I guess, I was so hypnagogic and I was supposed to write down things I remember but I didn't. I just went back to sleep and when I finally got up at 9:00 a.m, I think I totally forgot everything. Tsk, Tsk, tsk.

There are times in my dream stage where I know I dream a lot about sort of things. Too bad that when I am so tired, I can hardly recall everything. That was the case last night. I know I dreamt about lots of things but when I got up this morning, only one sequence of my dreams remained fresh and vivid in my memory.

I was inside a jeepney in my hometown. The driver was an elementary school-friend of mine. (I haven't seen him for several years now.)We were near a police station waiting for passengers to fill in. The site was familiar with me as it used to be the spot where I had to wait for jeepneys going to town. As the jeepney took off, I recognized some passengers whom I have not seen for a long time. One of them was a male neighbor and a friend, perhaps 8-years older than I am. He used to be one of my crushes in my teenage years. Another passenger was a fella whom I worked with as a youth leader in the village. The last time I heard of her was when she came back home from abroad to get married and settle to start her own family. I think she is back in Hongkong working as a domestic helper. Beside her in the jeepney, was a close friend of mine who now works in Canada. She looked beautiful as ever. I remember her glorious years joining beauty pageants in the neighborhood and taking home the bacon.

In my dreams, the roads were winding and topsy-turvy. It took us longer more than the usual to arrive at our destination. Some parts of the roads were dark and the driver was having a hard time shifting gears. When we arrived downtown, I saw my male neighbors' house instead. (Usually upon arriving downtown, the site is an old shopping mall owned by a rich and famous Chinese businessman in my hometown.) We were all in a hurry to get off the jeepney. He invited us to his house. "Hey, have you forgotten that we only have an hour from now to practice for the singing contest in the village?", he inquired. He climbed the concrete stairs to his house and waited for us to follow. When I looked up, I didn't see any house connected to the stairs. The stairs stood alone on the ground. As I and my other friends ascended the stairs, a huge piano greeted us. Like a scene in the Jack and the Beanstalk. The house seemed invisible from the outside. We were surprised to see that the guy-neighbor was playing the piano western-style. He was playing country music. We gave him suggestions about the piece that we were supposed to practice. He pushed some buttons on the piano organ itself and came three decks of tapes. He resorted to playing the tapes and we heard beautiful country music....then my alarm-clock rang at 10:00 a.m.

Deep slumber

Due to some personal problems, I was unable to post some of my dreams' narrations. I am really sorry for those who were waiting for new posts. You can check out my other blogsite a few hours from now to learn why I was unable to do my homework. Anyways, as I go to sleep an hour from now, I am expecting to have lucid dreams again. Watch out for it. Thanks to everyone for the visit.

Third Lucid Dream


Before I woke up that day, I had another dream sequence. The location was the school where I first worked at in my hometown. I was inside the office talking with my Filipina boss and a fellow worker. I saw my old Korean students outside the office waving their hands at me. They were delighted to see my presence at the school. My boss showed me a letter which she told was written by the same fellow-teacher I was just talking with earlier. I can't exactly recall the content of the memo but my boss asked me to correct it. After rectifying the mistakes, my boss turned to my fellow-teacher and she started shouting at her. The students outside were alarmed that they started shouting and they were roaring like lions. I remember myself talking with my boss about a possible rehire but I don't remember the rest of the talk.

It was already 11:00 in the morning when I heard the loud music downstairs. My boyfriend had awaken early and he started playing loud music.

Second Lucid Dream


After a few moments, we decided to leave my home. I could vividly recall that this guy whom I introduced as a boyfriend was wearing a white tight shirt which took the shape of his well-built figure. He was tall and handsome, a little thin but he had well-formed muscles. He was tugging me to leave. I couldn't understand why we left without even taking my baggage. Lingering in my mind was some kind of insecurity. What if he denied me after introducing him as my boyfriend? In my dream, he never confirmed that he was my boyfriend. He acted like a puppet and just followed my wishes and what I wanted to do. We didn't have the chance to have sex though as he seemed so preoccupied and I also had inhibitions.

While walking away from home, we met one of my friends in the neighborhood. In my dream, he appeared as my friend though his face looked like a co-worker I once met at a call center where I used to work. He was skinny and skin-head, with some make-up on. He looked so gay while trying to cover his head and his face with a multi-colored thin cloth and trying to climb a hill. My boyfriend did not notice him being gay and he instanly got attracted to him. I was trying to hide my jealousy as my boyfriend had taken the steps to follow my neighborhood friend. I saw my friend, lay on the ground on the hill. There were other people sleeping on the ground and they were covered with soil. They appeared to have been blanketed with soil. After a few seconds, my neighborhood friend covered himself with the soil-blanket. It was so flexible. Like the scene in latest Spiderman movie where a character named Sandman can take any form he wanted.

My friend fell asleep right away and my boyfriend was trying so hard to wake him up. He turned over and pulled his soil-blanket. His face now visible and without hesitation, my boyfriend started kissing him telling him that he was his long lost girlfriend. I was so shocked that after the revelation, they were both crying while they held each other's arms. When I looked into the sky, I saw tens of TV sets flashing in the sky and a voice-over in Malaysian or Indonesian Language announcing that they were looking for a princess who disguised as a guy.

First Lucid Dream

Who's That Guy In My Dream?

We were sharing happy moments at a certain apartment which I rented somewhere in Manila. In my dream he was my boyfriend. Totally different and more good-looking than my real-life boyfriend. We were in the kitchen giggling and fondling each other. The kitchen had a round table beautifully draped with an elegant cloth almost touching the floor. It perfectly matched the plain white walls. There were delicious meals on the table.

Never in my real life have I experienced living in a classy-looking apartment. In my dream, I was enjoying some blissful moments. After having a meal, I decided to go back to my hometown. I planned to take this guy with me and introduce him to my parents. I had doubts though and I felt uneasy. I was not so determined to take him with me because of fear that he might be rejected by my relatives and family members or my dad would have a nervous breakdown. We moved on though with the plan and I was so happy while we were seated together on the bus, our arms close to each other. I saw myself pillowing on his chest.

At home, the sight was my mom, my sister and my relatives playing a bingo game. Some neighbors were shocked to learn that I was gay. They had different reactions. I saw my sister crying when I told everybody that I was with my boyfriend. Later, I felt like in heaven for the momentary freedom given to me. Everybody accepted my revelation and there was a celebration. I didn't see my dad in the picture. My aunt hugged and told me, "I am happy that you have found yourself in Manila."

Later on, the picture was my sister and I playing some games which I cannot recall. She was telling me of her school problems and the school supplies she needed. She was telling me the number of times she was unable to buy all the school requirements. I promised her I would make sure all her needs are attended to. Suddenly, my boyfriend joined my sister and I. He just got from the other portion of the house and had chit-chat with my mom and my relatives. The next scene shocked me as I saw my sister fondling her feet onto my boyfriend's crotch. Surprisingly, I stayed my cool and I didn't give a violent reaction. I just ignored it. After a few minutes, my boyfriend exited the conversation with my sister and he made his way into the restroom. He went to the restroom. While I continued talking to my sister, I heard him singing a particular song.

Three Lucid Dreams (SYNOPSIS)

There are times I dream lucidly and there are times I can hardly recall what my dreams were all about. I certainly believe that we dream everyday. There are instances though that the moment our eyes open and we become conscious, our mind starts groping for a recall of our dreams. Most of the time, we get out of bed as if nothing happened last night.

You might have noticed that I don't post here everyday. When there are no posts, it means that I wasn't able to recall my dreams, or I might tend to procrastinate and post my dreams later. I still hope that you keep visiting this site for more unexpected posts.

Once, I read a book stating that the longest duration of one's dream is three seconds. After that, the sequence changes. Until now, I can't seem to be convinced that my dreams would just normally end in three seconds. Well, I really don't know. I think, I need to read more books about dreams so I have a better understanding of them.

Before going to sleep last night, I met a Malaysian guy at the Casino. He was lanky and good looking. I actually got attracted to him. He happened to be playing pontoon or black jack at the same table I was at. I thought he was a Filipino guy, he kept speaking in English so I interrupted. "Where are you from? Don't you know how to speak Tagalog?" "I am Malaysian," was his reply. Never in my life have I dreamed of meeting a handsome guy from Malaysia. I started imagining unimaginable things like, 'What if he were my boyfriend? He was a quiet guy who was more than 6 feet tall and with a fair complexion. He's got a well-formed nose which I am unfortunate to have. My friends would often refer to my nose as a 'parking lot.' When the dealing at the table we were at was over, we had to move to another table. I started riding some chips on his bet because he had winning streaks previously at the other table. Everytime we would win, he would always give me a dazzling look and I felt a little bit shy. We had small talks while playing but I did not bother to get to know him more because my boyfriend was also around there. I and my boyfriend left at around 2:00 a.m.

To be honest, I had to stealthily go to the Casino last night. My boyfriend had sternly warned me not to go there but I still did. He thought it would be impossible for me to get there since I had no shoes and pants for my get-up. People in shorts and slippers are not allowed in the Casino. I think it was already almost midnight when I hailed a jeepney going to the gambling place. I had to borrow the key to the office from my fellow teacher. I usually stay at the office during the weekdays and go home on weekends.

Out of several attempts, I came back to the office at dawn with some bunch of winnings. (The roosters had finished crowing I guess.)

I had to rush to my room so teachers won't see me going out late at night and coming back to the office early in the morning. That might give them some bad impression. None of them knows about my propensity for gambling and as much as possible I want to keep it a secret.

I barely had five hours of sleep. I had micro sleeps in the duration of my sleep because I had to wake up before lunch time for my afternoon class. I dreamt I was playing roulette again with some common playmates I often meet at the Casino. The location though was in my hometown and it was strange because we were playing roulette at a cafeteria overlooking a basketball court where I saw some teenagers dancing hiphoppily. I saw vague pictures of Koreans as well and I think, one Korean stood as my uncle who was throwing a party at home.

Stakes and Snakes

The other night, it was already past midnight when my boyfriend and I reached home. Sad, to say we had been to the Casino and we lost a couple of thousand pesos. I was hungry but I never bothered to have dinner anymore. I just undressed and laid my back to sleep.

I was trying to recall my dream sequence so I could start posting them accurately here. I don't remember the time I dozed off.

I and my sister were on an elevator which turned into a cubed ice cream container.

The scene was at the university which I attended a decade ago. I was touring my sister around and I was supposed to teach her how to get on the elevator there. (My sister rarely goes to town and she hasn't that much experience with elevators and stuff.)We first visited the library located at the 7th floor of the building. After that I decided to take her to my laboratory class on the ground floor of the same building. We got on the elevator and on the 5th floor the elevator suddenly turned into a blue ice cream container. We tried to fit ourselves on the ice cream container which I saw was being held by a chain connected to a large crane. When we got to the ground floor, we ended up being reprimanded by one of my professors.

I was playing roulette with my aunt.

When we got back home, the scene shifted to my aunts house. (Her house is made of two stories and the lower story is unfinished. It serves as a stockroom and a place where she hangs the clothes after washing them. The sun rarely goes up in Baguio so it is really hard to dry washed clothes. In there also lies an improvised pool table where my cousins and some neighbors play. That is also the area of the house where I used to play Bingo with my neighbors there.) I was playing roulette with my aunt. It was kinda strange because we were playing roulette together on a small wooden table. I remember explaining her the equivalent amount of chips and the bracketing of numbers. Roulette is supposed to be played on a big luxurious table. (A few days back, I also dreamed I was playing roulette in the mountains. I saw the faces of the people I usually play roulette with at the casino. In the mountains though, the roulette tables appeared to me as pool or billiard tables and were using big wooden chips, maybe the size of a leavened bread. I remember also talking to one of the folks in the mountains who appeared as the owner of the roulette table. Beside the roulette table were cabbages, carrots, and sweet potatoes. We were like in a vegetable garden or in a vegetable field. Funny, I was given chips out of sliced carrots and each chip was equivalent to ten pesos.)

After playing some roulette and after a chit-chat with my aunt, I decided to visit the nearby hill which used to be my favorite playground in my childhood. (These days, the hill is gone as the place has been buldozed and was developed into a residential area.) As I was tracing back happy memories on the hill, I came across small rattle snakes with tints of red and white color. I was really scared that every part of the ground I stepped on appeared a snake either camouflaging under fallen brown foliages or pine-needles. I was shouting while trying to avoid stepping on the snake on my way home. Then I heard some voice. I heard one of the ESL teachers I am working with right now. She was delivering a newscast in the mountain and her voice was like echoing in the area where I also saw a cataract of water cascading down the hill. I was trying to talk to her but she seemed unable to hear me.

"Tok, tok, tok!" I heard the knock at the door and it was my boyfriend's nephew telling me to get up and have some breakfast as I had to prepare for work.

Snakes and Stakes

Snakes are the creatures I am most horrified by and gambling the habit I am very much addicted to. I cannot count the number of times I have dreamed of snakes though lately, gambling scenarios also cloud my dreams unceasingly in the past few days.

The other night, my dream took me to my hometown in the northern part of the Philippines. I have not been home for the last three or four months and I am really dying to see my family and my friends. In fact, two days from now, my boss will be allowing me to spend five days of vacation leave but I have no hope of making it to my hometown because I have no money at this point. I lost again at the Casino and it seems that I don't want to talk about losing anymore.

In my dreams, I saw myself and my boyfriend on a bus trying to fit our luggage on the racks inside the bus. We were arguing about our cellphones, as I wanted him to swap phones with me. Mine was an old model and his was the latest one. I think I wanted to show my parents that I could afford to buy the latest one since they expect a lot from me having a good job here in the Capital City of the Philippines.

At the bus terminal my brother picked us up driving his own 20-wheeler truck. Once inside the truck, I was wondering why it was a truck. Actually or in reality my brother is a jeepney driver. I remember my brother giving us a joy ride around the town in my hometown and my old friends one by one started joining us for the ride. When I got back home, our house was a picture of how it was like when I was a five-year old boy. It was really really old. The poorest house in the village and the only shanty in the neigborhood. Inside the house, you could not see double walls but galvanized irons with soots formed from the smoke coming from the dirty kitchen. There was no flooring as I saw myself stepping on the soiled ground.

I remember talking to my mom wearing a black sweater and her eyes teary because of the smoke coming from the dirty kitchen. She was watching TV at that time on a 7-inch screen. I actually have that TV now here in Manila. Their real TV at home is a 21-inch LG. In my dreams the TV set though was broken so my mom could only listen to the people talking but she could not see the images. I think I promised my mom I would buy her a new one on my way back to Manila and send it home. After that small talk with my mom, I asked my youngest brother and sister to come with us as I and my boyfriend whom they just know as a good friend of mine would go around the parks and souvenir stores in my city. We visited a place where they sell native artifacts and souvenirs. There was this open store with a thatched roof and a pole in the middle extending into the sky as it protruded out of the roof. Coiled around it was a really big snake. The biggest snake I have ever seen in my dreams. It looked like an anaconda and it was in grayish color. I was just staring at it with unexplained fears when all of a sudden I heard a cry nearby. It was my brother. Some store owners hammered him down to the ground because they thought he was a snatcher. I rushed to the scene and I started cryin out loud begging for help to rescue my innocent brother. I could see him pounded under the ground. I could see him from atop and he was trapped underground. When the store owners pounded him, he was like a nail which easily penetrated the soil and the ground closed at once. I rushed to open a small crack of the ground so I could see my brother and somehow make a way for some air to get through so he could breathe. I started shouting while tears were rolling down my eyes at the store owners telling them that he was my brother. Later on, he was rescued.

Arguing about buying a tribal head dress for my boyfriend was the last thing I remember about this dream of mine the other night.

When I became conscious, I kissed my boyfriend and I started thinking about my family back home.

Numerous times in the past, I dreamt I was losing one of the pair of my shoes or my slippers. I really didn't know what my dreams meant. In the picture, I could see my self running in a muddy ground and either my right or left shoe would get stuck in the ground prohibiting me to keep moving. One time I was in a swamp and I left one of the pair of my slippers. I could recall incidents when I dreamt of the same scenario. Last night though was different and I also have no idea about what that dream of mine means. I was with my old friends and we were going on hiking. In my dream, I couldn't climb the peak of the mountain and my friends behind me were teasing and encouraging me to do it...

I am an English Teacher and not a Psychologist but sometimes I tend to give my own interpretation to my dreams. Indeed, I have many goals in life which haven't been realized yet. There is probably something I want to do or achieve which apparently I can't because something must be holding it back. I think I also know what that is but do not have the courage to totally do something about it. Ah, sometimes I hate me...

Flying Dreams-Keep Coming Back

Superman is one of my favorite superheroes. I had a very special inclination towards Superman eversince though I did not get much chance to watch all the series. My family was not that priviliged to own its own TV set and I was lucky everytime my classmate in elementary would invite me to his house and we keep watching Superman videos. Amazement is the word that best describes the feeling I have everytime I think of him, much more when I see him on the screen. When I was a kid, I always dreamt of flying myself. I wanted to know how it felt flying and being a famous superhero that people in the world look upto. How I eagered to save people from evils and catch robbers in heists. (Sigh) Those were the days.

When playing with friends, I always put on an empty sack of rice tied around my neck and mimic Superman flying. I would look for heights where I could jump with my right hand thrusted forward in a clenched fist and my left hand towards my chest.

I really wonder how it feels like flying. I am getting older and for the record I haven’t tried getting on the plane yet, so I have no idea how having jetlag feels. Is that similar to a buslag? Well, if there is a such a term.

One of the dreams which keep crossing my mind occurred back in my college years. Though occasionaly, I see the same kind of dream. I would see myself in a mountain flying and swooping down the hills and rooftops in the neighborhood. I had no cape or whatsoever. I was just flying. Later on, I would see myself riding a bicycle flying. After that, I see myself involved in some chase incidents and while trying to elude the bad guys running after me, I would suddenly transform into a frog leaping hundreds of meters into the sky. At one point, I saw myself driving a car and the car was also flying. Before I arose into consciousness, the car cascaded down on a cliff…Weird..What do you think?

I had to borrow that line from Toni Gonzaga, a famous celebrity in the Philippines who got popularized by hosting the PBB-Philippine Version. This is my third blog and I am really excited about it. This will be my dreams’ sanctuary.

I have always been fascinated by my dreams and there’s no better way to share them than narrating them here as vividly as possible. According to Sigmund Freud, dreams are the interpretations of our sexual desires. An old friend of mine always agreed on that and always insinuated me of my sexual preference. When I was still in a closet, I would often tell him who also happens to be a Psychology major that I always dream of snakes. I have always considered sleeping my second life and dreaming as the extension of my blissful and suppressed existence. I wonder if that makes sense. Watch out for my upcoming posts.

With love,

Lord Manila Stone

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